Where do you live? Seattle, Wash.
What sort of job did you hold? Architectural designer.
In what industry? Retail design.
How old were most of your coworkers? The majority of my immediate coworkers were in their 20s and 30s. Not one of us saw what was coming.
How did you find out you were losing your job? Every week in our very large firm, we would see one of the Directors walking somberly to some poor schmo's desk, then walk them back to their office; this began just a few months after the economy began to slide. Often these about-to-be unemployed folks were escorted out, sad-eyed and disbelieving. When the Director came to my desk and offered a sad, controlled smile, I knew. I turned to my beloved coworker and said (this isn't something one forgets) "This is it, my sweet." She guffawed, thinking that I, and she, and the rest of us were safe. This stuff only happens to OTHER people. She was wrong. I knew instantly.
Did you leave immediately, or did they give you a few weeks to get used to the idea? In this economy, and in architecture especially, there is no advanced warning, per se. We all knew it was happening, but we also (falsely) knew we would never be laid off; we were too important. I was asked to leave that day, but unlike most of the people laid off, I didn't have to be escorted out of the building. I went back to my pod clenching my jaw, thinking of all of the things I had yet to do, things I wanted to say. The walk back to my desk took three minutes to a year.
Tell us a little about what you did: Upon returning to my pod, I walked up behind 3 of my coworkers and stood there. I lost my English for a spell, and they ultimately turned around and saw that I was distraught, with red eyes, clenching and unclenching hands. I relayed the bad news and (I am not proud of this) began to cry. Not one of them believed this was happening. Again, the notion that this was something that only happened to others held sway over us all. I sat down at my desk and looked at all of my work, my drawings, my massive Photoshop compilations, pictures, empty soda cans, notes, sketches, pencils, markers...the accumulated effects of a year's work. It felt impossible that I would now have to remove it all. I chose not to do it that day, and arranged to come back later in the week. I said a prolonged and surreal goodbye to everyone, and walked out.
What was your favorite part of the job? This was the first design job I had in which I worked with a team. My team was amazing - sure there was a bad egg, but we overcame it's effects through comradery and jokes and a shared love of design and architecture. Working as an integral part of a larger entity gave me such a warm feeling, helped me realize my worth, and made learning so much more easy.
What was the worst part? I came into this job in Seattle from New York City, from an office of two to an office of 700. I came onboard toward the end of a very large international project and was given the responsibility of designing one level of an upscale department store – the market (grocery) level. I had no idea how to design such a beast, and no one else did either. To make the whole situation dicier, I was new to many of the programs that this firm used. For many months, I worked from 8 in morning to 11 or 12 at night. I gained weight. I was a wreck.
Did you like going to work? Going to work was something that I sometimes loathed, knowing that it would be a 16 hour day and that it would be an uphill battle the whole time. After 6 months or so, however, this feeling diminished and I began to cherish working; I dug my coworkers and valued what I was doing. It was often downright fun.
Did you feel like you were making a difference? In the beginning I felt that nothing I did mattered. It felt as if I were pushing a rock up the proverbial hill. I began to notice that this wasn't true, though. People came to me for help or advice. People noticed my work.I received an astonishingly good review and concomitant raise. I felt like I had arrived.
What have you been doing since you've been laid off? Been laid off for a while now. I realised, a few months into the forced respite, that I was drinking much too much. I had put on significant weight. So I quit and began swimming. I began volunteering. My garden flourished as a result of my attention. I resumed writing and sketching and reading and all those very important things that I let go of when working. I recently started a cooking group. Taken up Scherenschnitte. This isn't to say that it's been all roses: I am moody and wake up some mornings feeling so low that merely getting up is a task. I've upped my weekly intake of therapy.
How do you spend your days? I typically wake up and log on, looking for jobs. I journal, keeping track of all the strange little thoughts that come unbidden to mind. Coffee propels me. I walk more, swim more, and talk to friends routinely. I cook on a daily basis and seek out recipes that challenge me. I'm frustrated to say that I watch too much tube and log on to MyFaceLinkedSpace way too much.
Have your spending habits changed? I don't buy booze anymore, and that's rather big, as I was a fan of 18 year old scotches. I no longer allow myself to venture into vintage and antique shops; the siren song is too strong, and while the purchases were generally cheap-ish, they do add up.
How many jobs have you applied for since you have been laid off? I've applied for over 110 jobs.
What kind of job will you go for next? Will it be in the same industry or a different one? While I have a master's in design, I do have significant experience in social services, and am actively looking in that field as well...unfortunately, when potential social service employers see that I have a masters in design, they want nothing to do with me, knowing that once the economy brightens, I will be leaving. I continue to look for jobs in both architectural design and the social services. One pays much better, but I can do either, and you know what they say about beggars being choosers.
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